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When ailing parents and young kids need to be cared for at the same time, it can really stretch a person or a family unit to their capacity. Here are a few ideas for things that can be done to minimize stress and make this situation more manageable.
Outsource
Consider outsourcing anything that can be reasonably outsourced. Whether that is having a person come and professionally clean your home, engaging a personal shopper, or simplifying your daily menu, there are all kinds of ways to get help close to home.
If you are a spouse whose partner does most of the care giving of both the kids and parents, you can pick up chores that they normally take care of. Priorities are shifting in this stage of life and so must responsibilities for the integrity of the family unit.
Lower Your Expectations
Every effort should be made to uphold important traditions whether that is eating together, restful Sunday afternoons, or date nights. Other things that are not as big of a deal for any member of the family can be temporarily dismissed. For example, if family members don’t care whether food is homemade or fast food, choose the one that makes the most sense with the resources you have available.
This is a time in life where grace should be lavished on the family and expectations can be lowered to survive this stressful time.
It is Only Temporary
Just remember that this time in your life is a stage. Just as your children will grow and become more independent, this extremely exhausting phase will not last forever. As much as possible, savor the good that comes out of serving one another.
Maintain Connection
Rely on your community of friends, family and support. If the other set of grandparents is in good health and is willing to help out with running the children to activities or keeping the kids so you and your spouse can connect, let them help.
Health and Self-care
Rest, healthy eating, exercise, and self-compassion should all be practiced for optimal health of each family member. You can’t properly care for loved ones if you are not taking care of yourself. Proper self-care is important especially during stressful seasons of life.
You need to take some time off away from your daily routine to relax and rejuvenate. Relaxing will help you eliminate the stresses or pent-up emotions you might have built during your caregiving time. It may seem selfish, but it is necessary to have some alone-time to ensure you keep in touch with your personality.
There are numerous relaxation techniques and activities that you can do to let go of your stresses. It can be as simple as taking a nature walk, traveling, spa appointments, or partying. Make sure you alternate these activities to keep you entertained and rejuvenated always.
Before you leave, ensure that you enlist reliable caregivers to stand in for you when you are away. Take them through the daily routines to ensure that they are adept at the tasks at hand.
Hospice
When it comes to the last weeks and days of your parent’s life, consider hospice care. It allows your loved one peace and comfort while giving you time to prepare for next steps. Through hospice, they can help manage pain and allow your parent to still have personal control over their life, say the experts at Cornerstone Hospice and Palliative Care.
While this may be a stressful time, it’s important to find ways to cope and accept help from others. There are many steps you can take to reduce stress and handle the responsibilities of caregiving.
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