Have you ever felt so disconnected from your kids that you didn’t know where to begin when it came to rebuilding your relationship? I think every parent experiences this at some point. As for my family, we have been so busy with life changes, toddlers, babies, homeschooling, and work that our biggest children began to feel more like roommates than our own children. We had to rebuild, needed to regroup. We had no idea where to begin.
For family regrouping, we started with hug therapy. Each of my children get a hug from us in the morning. At first my teens were completely confused and bewildered by the idea, but now they will come straight into the kitchen and greet me with a hug the moment they wake up. I love that I have the opportunity to hug my children each morning — not all parents get to do this, thus I am thankful for it.
The next step was to connect with our children on a personable level. We try to keep the communication lines open with our children, but we don’t always feel like we are asking the right questions. This is where the Dare2Share Kids app has come in handy. I call them my parent cheat cards. The app allows me to gather questions to ask my child(ren) during our one on one time.
Why is communication necessary? Kids need to spend individual time with their parents, without a brother or a sister. This quality alone time ensures that the child feels loved, special and safe. Every child has a desire that his/her opinions and needs be heard and respected even if their parents don’t necessarily agree. If parents allow their children to honestly voice their frustrations, feelings, and needs, they create a platform where children feel safe to communicate honestly with their parents. In this way, parents also help their children to communicate about negative things in a healthy manner instead of suppressing it.
Dare2Share challenges parents to spend conflict free alone time with their children on an individual basis. The cards create a platform where your children can honestly communicate their opinions, needs, and feelings.
Getting started with Dare2Share Kids:
The introduction to Dare2Share Kids was very helpful. I was able to review the introduction multiple times until I understood the message and how to use Dare2Share Kids properly. When I completed the introduction and entered the app, I immediately knew how to use it thanks to the thorough instructions.
How to use Dare2Share Kids:
Although Dare2Share Kids recommends setting dates for each individual child to have one on one time with the parents, we had to adapt to what our family could do. For us, this meant we used Dare2Share daily while getting the kids settled in for bed. Bedtime is the one time of day when put all of our children to bed and go from room to room talking to each child. The little ones don’t try to interrupt and my bigger kids don’t join in on the other sibling’s conversation. All of my kids know that we will make it to them and they will have time with us when it is their turn.
We used one card each night, with the child(ren) being aware that we were using the Dare2Share app.
My biggest fear with the app was that my oldest children would think…
“gosh, they need an app just to learn to talk to us”.
I was very thankful that none of the kids felt that way, teased that they might, or indicated in any way that they felt uneasy about using the app. They answered each set of questions thoughtfully and never gave half-hearted answers or appeared to be annoyed by the questions.
Do I feel any closer to my children today compared to before I started using Dare2Share?
Yes, I think we have established a great routine with Dare2Share Kids and I like how easily the kids answer the questions and interact with us when we use it. Much like their cooperation when playing a game.
I really enjoyed the questions, many of them are something I never would have thought to ask my child or have my children ask me.
Visit Dare2Share Kids to learn more about how they are working toward helping parents and children interact together.
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