Making resolutions is one thing; it’s the keeping of them that is hard. When January 1st rolls around, the spirit of renewal and rejuvenation is so high, it prompts people to want to better themselves, to reach for higher goals and become more self-aware. It’s a time for rethinking career and relationship goals, and the year of empty boxes on the calendar is like a book waiting to be filled.
Choose One Resolution Only
While most of us have many things about ourselves we’d like to work on, don’t make the mistake and get overwhelmed by making too many resolutions. It’s not feasible to work toward more than one goal at a time, so choose a resolution that is close to your heart, and one you feel confidently you can keep. Popular resolutions include:
- Quitting Smoking
- Losing Weight
- Saving Money
- Eating Healthier
- Making Friends
Get Specific and Be Realistic
“Becoming a millionaire” might be a goal for many of us, but in reality, it’s not likely to happen, at least not in the span of one year. Separate your dreams from realistic goals – or break down your dreams into realistic steps that you can achieve over time. For example, you wouldn’t expect to lose 30 lbs. in a night, and you wouldn’t expect to enjoy a wide social network over the course of one weekend.
Take Small Bites
Write out a detailed plan for the resolution you choose, along with the exact steps and timeline you expect to follow while you work toward it. If you want to save money, you can vow to stop using credit cards, and pay more than the minimum amount due every month. Use egift cards to save time and money when you buy birthday or wedding gifts, as they can be conveniently sent via text or email, with the balance easily tracked.
Ask for Support
It’s often too difficult to work toward a goal without the encouragement and support of friends and family. Confide in members of your trusted circle and let them know what your hopes are – so that they can fall in line beside you and help you make good choices.
Journal It!
Writing things down is one way the mind makes a commitment toward a goal or a dream. There’s permanence to it, and it’s easier for us as individuals to take the goal seriously. Another benefit of starting a resolutions journal is looking back at the progress you’ve made over time, which can build tremendous self-confidence, and keep you working at it when times get tough!
Break Free of the Cycle of Past Failures
In psychology, the word ‘failure’ is a bad word. However, in real life, trying something and not succeeding feels like you have failed. Change the perspective of ‘failure’ into meaning that your approach to an idea or problem – or resolution – should simply be different.
If you tried losing weight last year and didn’t succeed, write down why. Were you not committed enough to the goal? Did you not have enough support? Sit down and work toward figuring out what went wrong, so you won’t repeat the cycle this year.
Change is a Process, Not a Light Switch
The key is not perfection, here. The key is consistency. You’re bound to slip up now and again. Your daughter will bake brownies or you have a really rough day and smoke a cigarette. As long as your daily intentions remain focused on your ultimate goal, be patient and kind with yourself when you slip up.
If you find you’re using slip ups as an excuse, it’s time to re-evaluate your true motivation and commitment. But, just as anything worth having, resolutions take time to achieve.
Find Ways to Get Motivated
Motivation is always high at the beginning of any new project. There’s a creative awakening that has the potential for great fulfillment, and it can feel as positive and cheery as most anything humans can encounter. And then comes day 23.
Waking up at 5am to run around the neighborhood, it’s 30 degrees, you didn’t get enough sleep, and the bed is just too warm and cozy to leave.
Remember, you don’t have to be motivated to get motivated. As long as you can start by moving in the general direction you want to go, motivation will come with the action you take.
- Review your goals and the progress you’ve made (ideally in your resolution journal)
- Pump yourself up with positive self-talk and mirror high fives
- Practice mindfulness regularly
- Practice self-compassion for when you have bad days
A new year means new choices, new paths, and new goals. Make those goals and dreams productive and meaningful by respecting them with focus, intention, and a unique space in your life.